Wednesday, March 23, 2016

Tattoos not required

A fellow blogger, and friend,  Jane from Breaking The Angel was the inspiration behind this post. You see, she made a comment on my last post that inspired me. Thank you very much, Jane.

What happened was quite simple: I posted about my personal point of view with regards to being goth and being a tattooed parent. Jane pointed out in the comments that sometimes it could be the opposite. She was called a Mallgoth because she does not have any body modifications. This pissed me off because in all honesty, you don't need tattoos or piercings to be goth! How absurd is that?

I admit, perhaps it was a little close minded on my part for overlooking that side of the fence. This was not done on purpose. For me personally,  I never really cared whether or not someone has tattoos.


It also never occurred to me that being goth meant a mandatory tattoo or piercing. I never judged anyone by their appearance or for their beliefs. I have friends from all walks of life and you don't need a dress code to be my friend, you just need to be a good person! I have friends who have very different views than I do. I have Goth friends and some who aren't. I have friends who are the exact opposite from me and we get along! I guess in my naivete, I never considered that this would even be a possibility.

Although her experiences were not very pleasant, I was grateful for her honesty and for allowing me to put my two cents in over here. In fact, I want to express them here:



* While I do dye my hair black because I HATE my natural color, you do not need to do so to be goth.*

*You don't need to have piercings or tattoos to be goth.*

*You can date or marry a non-goth and you yourself can still be goth. Your partner doesn't need or have to be goth. My husband, while normally dresses all in black leans more towards the geek side than goth. *

*As much as I am a believer in how people should know who the original couple of bands are (ie Siouxsie, The Sisters Of Mercy, etc) you don't have to like them to be goth. In fact, a lot of these bands (*cough, cough* Eldritch) reject the goth label, therefore, I like to think there are not really many goth bands out there but lots of goth music, if that makes sense. There is so much more out there too! There's tons of music that came out after the eighties that are awesome to listen to. Cruxshadows, Blutengel, Sopor Aeternus, Switch Blade Symphony are a few bands that come to mind.  I bet some of the younger readers could add a few more recent ones to this list! (note to self. Research current goth music. I'm getting old!) ****


I am not taking back what I posted. I love my body art. I want more and I wanted to write about my personal experiences being a mom who has tattoos and who is goth but I don't expect everyone to be like me. In all honesty, that would be boring! I like seeing parents who have body art and/or are goth because well, I am a huge fan of body art and don't know too many fellow goth parents offline. These are my own personal preferences but I really don't care if someone has tattoos or doesn't. Just like I can have fun with people who are not parents. I will still be friends with someone and not judge them over what they decide to do with their bodies because in all honesty, it is none of my business!  It was refreshing for me to look at the world through someone else's eyes. Thanks Jane for providing me with that opportunity!
How stereotypes view stereotypes!!!!!



14 comments:

  1. Well that sounds just very absurd and childish. For example, a goth's profession may be a nurse when it is forbidden to have any facial pearcings because of the higher risk of infections :D So I guess these people are saying that a one can't be a nurse and a goth? Haha. I myself am a non-goth but a metallist and a nurse with several tattoos, but my pictures can be hidden when needed. Well over 1 million Finns of our 5 million population are tattooed so they really can not ban tattoos :) Facial pearcings I do not have anymore for the sake of my own health.

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    1. That is true and it is absurd! In my neck of the woods, especially here in Montreal, from what I have seen, tattoos are becoming more and more acceptable in the workplace. Not all companies are lenient though but it seems to be a little more open than in the past. I see people working in the bank with tattoos, that was something that did not happen a couple of years ago.

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  2. I hope I wasn't too grumpy :) As I said, I do like tats and mods, they just aren't for me (and I've never died my hair either!!! Still, red hair is striking enough on its own I guess). It's only recently I've had comments.

    What you said about spouses - mine is also a black wearing geek and he has actually been called out at Whitby Goth Festival recently as a non-goth, questioning his right to be there. Cos, like, he's been going since 2001 and listens to quite a bit of goth music, supports the local scene etc. Yawn. One of the people asking him about it (in the pub, while I was in the toilet) was polite - others not so much.

    Good post, thank you for doing it :)

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    1. No prob! I cant believe people would be so outright rude like that! Wow! If I had your haircolor, I honestly doubt I would put any color in it! P.S. I didnt think you were grumpy at all. You were very polite. To be honest, you have a right to be grumpy because I know I would be should that ever happen to me :)

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    2. Ah thank you, I must admit I am pretty fond of my red hair! Forgot to mention, the husband did flirt with body piercings once until the unfortunate incident with the nipple ring and his watch strap....! OUCH! He's still missing a bit of nipple!

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    3. OUCH! I wanted a nipple piercing until a friend of mine, who is a huge guy told me he got his done. He said it hurt so bad (the procedure) that he cried like a baby and passed out. I changed my mind quickly!

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  3. Hm...I come from a country, where goth exists only as a phenomenon, but not as a subculture. Actually, the whole 'trend' pretty much died out already, but back in the day, you could only belong with the so called goths if you had visible tattoos, dozens of extreme piercings, colorful hair, fake dreads and you wore the most popular goth brands, preferably cyber attire...I have nothing against either natural looks or body mods, because frankly, I don't think it matters. I've never actually cared about such things, but to be completely honest, I'm very disappointed by this pretentious elitism I experienced until this very day...I don't think any of the above mentioned features are required to seem goth enough, moreover, I honestly believe, taht there's absolutely no need to prove your love for whatever at all, especially not with your looks. What if you - for whatever obvious reason, like, your job, financials, etc.. - can't afford to look the part? Do you automatically lose your right to love the thing if your looks don't reflect it? Ehh, sorry...I'm just ranting here^^

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    1. Wow. Thank you Lynoire for sharing your experience, I am always interested in hearing about the subculture from around the world! That is really sad.

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  4. Body mods have become mainstream so it cannot even be labelled "goth". I knew a colleague who dressed very strict or at least casual and has tattoos. I dressed a bit more alternative and whimsical but have no body mod at all!

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  5. Gosh, I hate when people try to simply clone themselves, my coloring book comment was not meant to say one has to be tattooed... But seriously, whatever a person choses to do with their lives and body, as long as they are happy I am fine and when there are enough of same interests we can be friends! -_-

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