Saturday, August 30, 2014

Corp Goth problems!

For entertainment purposes, I have compiled a silly list of "typical corp goth problems"

The inspiration for this post? I work in outdoor fashion and the majority of my co-workers are outdoor enthusiasts. There is nothing wrong with that. In fact, I like to go hiking and camping myself.

Twice a year, my company hosts an event (a summer and winter activity) where we go skiing/snowboarding and usually a boating event in the summer.These activities are planned on a workday, usually a Friday. You pretty much get a free, paid day, it is a pretty sweet deal!

I sometimes go to the winter event because it is not mandatory for us to ski or snowboard, although next year, I may change that. If that is the case, and I do decide to ski or snowboard, do not fret dear readers, I will try to get as many pictures I can of me falling on my ass! Usually, I sit in the chalet sipping hot cocoa with a good book or I walk around to admire the landscape.

The summer event is the bane of my existence. Like most goths, I do not fair well in the heat. Even if I were not to wear black, I burn. SPF 60 sunblock is my best friend. I have bad allergies to pollen and hay fever. I also get heat exhaustion and heat stroke very easily. I learned my lesson the hard way when I fainted from being outdoors too long and was even advised by a doctor to avoid going outdoors on hot/humid days. Like the winter event, it is not mandatory to participate in the sport, you can go and enjoy the day....outdoors!

This year, my company is sending us rafting and will be held  very soon. While the idea of rafting sounds like a lot of fun to me, I am scared I may not fare well in the heat so I am not taking any chances! While everyone is out having fun, I opted to come to work instead! I even checked the weather prediction for that day and it was announced fairly mild but weather can always change.Sometimes, it gets pretty darned hot here in early September.  Instead of having the company pay for me  for nothing, I figured it would be best that I stay indoors where there is air conditioning. I did not want to subject myself to the embarrassment of fainting or getting sick in front of my co-workers! Why ruin their fun because I have vampire-like qualities (how cool is that?)

That being said, I have compiled a cute and fun little list of corp goth problems. Some of these are from my current job, some of them are from other places I have worked. If you have any thing you might want to add, why not! Comments are open!

Here is my list:

- Long skirts and chairs with rollers!

- Hearing remarks because you wore color that day (Luckily for me, they stopped doing that)

-Having a facial piercing fall out while you are eating in the cafeteria

- Putting that facial piercing back in and having a squeamish co-worker walk in the ladies room while you are doing it.

- Helping out upper management with their expense reports and you KNOW that they are pretending to not notice the very obvious black nail polish that got stuck on the tape from taping down all those receipts!

- People thinking and sometimes treating you like a kid because you look younger than you really are and most people think goth is something you grow out of! Certainly a grown woman with a kid cant be goth!

- This isn't really a problem but it is really sweet how some co-workers go out of their way to wish me a Happy Halloween! Even better, they give me candy!

- The majority of my coworkers are sports enthusiasts. I hear sports talk all day!

- When coworkers talk to me about sports and my eyes glaze over!

- I had a very nice fishnet shirt. The sleeves were fishnet and the rest was a cotton fabric, very suitable for work. I got it at the mall several years ago and have not been able to find another one since.  The sleeve got caught on the door and made a huge hole.

- This is no longer an issue (no dress code) but casual Friday was always a challenge.

- Being pulled on the dance floor to songs you don't like at the Christmas party

- When they do play a song you like (usually an 80's song) people stare (sometimes comment) when you bust out a dance move you normally do in a goth club!

- You get a little tipsy at the company Christmas party and you dance to hip-hop!

- People tell you how you remind them of that girl on that TV show NCIS...

- People telling you how they knew someone or how they used to be goth in High school. I get it, to them, this is a "new" conversation but I heard this one so many times! I can almost recite how the conversation goes.


  1. omg the chairs with the rollers

  2. I get the "Do you watch NCIS?" all the time, and I don't but I know where they're going with it.

    These were pretty funny but the being treated like a kid one isn't so much because it is a harsh reality and I think that happens to many of us. I can put up with the BS comments, "oh look, you're wearing black again" but being treated like my style is a phase annoys me. Now that I'm 40 I find myself pushing back a little reminding them that I have dressed like this since I was 15. Sometimes when I am asked why I dress the way I do I start tearing the asker apart-- "why do you feel comfortable wearing what everyone else in the office wears? How does it feel to not make an active choice in your wardrobe but buy into what media tells you to wear" but that's mostly on bad days. Once I even said, "yellow reminds me of sickness" when a coworker wearing yellow asked why I always wore black. I'm really not a mean girl but sometimes I snap :-/

    1. Yeah I hear you too. I have made my share of snarky remarks as well

  3. This list made me smile. Except for the piercings I've experienced every single one. Too bad about not being able to go rafting. My compnay will normally go on a ski-trip every winter too. Two years ago we stayed at a spa-hotell and we got to choose if we wanted to spend the day on the slopes or in the spa! Sometimes the bosses do make sensible decisions :)

  4. I don't even work in an office but I can completely relate to these! I work in a bar so customer's comments can be that much more blunt because the influence of alcohol makes people much less aware of how rude they can sound sometimes. It is funny though! Most of the time I can just smile and roll my eyes at them :)

    1. LOL I can only imagine what people would say under the influence. Must be fun working in a bar though. I always wanted to bartend myself

  5. Haha! These are so true. I've gotten the NCIS one soooo many times, too! I don't even watch TV, so the first time someone said that I had no idea what they were talking about. :)

    And that last one, about "I knew a Goth in high school..." Or even "My daughter went through a Goth phase..." People truly can't seem to understand why this is so offensive!!!

    1. I know, I try to think they are just trying to be polite and make conversation but it gets annoying. I usually try to find normal, mundane things to relate to them to avoid that conversation but it ALWAYS creeps up.

  6. Great list - the chair one and long skirts brought a wince of recognition. I was on a uni study tour of European political institutions wearing a long black skirt with flat boots - risky when you are 5 foot tall. There was a beautiful central atrium in the European Parliament building in Strasbourg where naturally my skirt got stuck in the elevator as it cruised gracefully up the middle...mortifying. Still, it could have been worse, it could have happened at our next stop - NATO!

    1. LOL how embarrassing. I am also 5 feet tall so I hear your pain.

  7. I'm reading this as I sit in my chair with rollers at work, trying not to snort as I think of all the long/gauzy/full skirts I have that are put into mortal danger every time I wear them here. Doesn't matter how long they are, if they're full enough I still have to watch it!

    And be glad if you only have to listen to sports talk at work... my husband is a sports fanatic, so I have to hear it all evening and weekend as well!!! :-P

    1. OOOH I consider myself lucky then! My husband is really nerdy so I hear all kinds of videogame, rpg talk lol

    2. Hehehe, that could get a bit annoying as well, but hopefully you are more into that than sports, or at least understand it. When Martin goes on too long about football, I just start singing Sisters of Mercy's "Wide Receiver" over and over in my head. Sort of the goth version of "lalalalalalalalalala..."!! ;-)



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